


A War of Belief

by RookieOneWrites



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses, Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends: Knights of the Old Republic (Video Games)
Genre: F/M, Pre-Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-10
Updated: 2020-05-17
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:41:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,281
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24111469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RookieOneWrites/pseuds/RookieOneWrites
Summary: Lorenz and Marianne's romance blossoms as the first seeds of the Jedi Civil War take root at the enclave on Dantooine. Part of a larger Fire Emblem/Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic AU.
Relationships: Marianne von Edmund & Lorenz Hellman Gloucester, Marianne von Edmund/Lorenz Hellman Gloucester
Comments: 3
Kudos: 11





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> For LoreMari Week 2020. First prompt, May 10: Flowers/First Date/First Meeting

Lorenz took in another breath of the clean Dantooine air. He loved the crispness of the early morning breeze on his skin. He especially loved the way it made his robes wave in the wind. He could picture himself as one of the great Jedi heroes, standing atop a hill in triumph. The sun peaked just over the horizon and bathed the plains in the golden light of dawn. He could hear the cries of animals just waking up and for a moment, Lorenz felt as if the whole Force reached out and placed its hand on him.

Something flickered at the edge of his perception. A dark spot in the bright morning edged closer to where he stood. He turned around to where he sensed it and nearly went for his lightsaber. But where he expected a predator or enemy of some kind, he saw only a young woman stumbling through the high grass of the Dantooine plains. She wore the same padawan robes that he did, making her a fellow student at the Jedi Enclave. Other than her blue hair, Lorenz could not see anything notable about her at first.

The young woman looked up, met Lorenz’s gaze, and then quickly turned her eyes down again.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to disturb you.” 

Her voice sounded like little more than a whimper to Lorenz. Even the slight, gentle noise of the rustling grasses nearly swallowed her words. Despite this, Lorenz found himself struggling with his response for a moment.

“Not at all! I had simply come out to the plains for an early morning meditation! My master said that I must better appreciate the living Force and instruct me to study the wildlife that surrounds the Enclave.”

The young woman gave a gentle smile and risked another glance up towards Lorenz. He felt his heart skip a beat under his robes. She possessed the softest and most beautiful eyes. The brown of her irises glowed in the light and took on the appearance of shining amber. 

“That sounds nice. I wish my master gave me more assignments like that…”

“Who is your master?”

The girl’s expression immediately fell and her eyes shot back towards the ground. Lorenz almost stepped forward so that he might raise her chin up just so that he could again behold her eyes, but he fought the instinct and waited for the girl’s response. 

“Master Vrook. He’s--"

Harsh. Lorenz knew that. Every student at the enclave did. Master Vrook preached absolute adherence to the Jedi Code and unquestioning obedience to the Council. Even for a padawan like Lorenz, Vrook seemed... strict.

"Ah, say no more. If I may ask, what was it that brought you out here at such an early hour?"

“I-- I was hoping I could see the brith from here. I heard that they come closest to the Enclave in the early morning, before they spot all the people moving around the grounds… and retreat to a safer distance. I know how they feel.”

Lorenz seemed taken aback at the amount of fear radiating off the young woman. Though she seemed gentle and honest to Lorenz's eyes, the Force told him that the young woman radiated fear. That initial dark spot in the Force he sensed came from her. In the second before he responded, he silently promised himself that he would not match her fear with his own. He would do as a true Jedi should and lead her out of fear by example. 

"Well then, please permit me to escort you to a nearby hill that I know of! I’m certain we will get an excellent view of the brith as they fly over!” 

The young woman's fear took hold of her again and she took a sideways step as she spoke.

“Oh, there’s no need for you to do that for me. I don’t mean to delay you from your duties.”

Lorenz threw his head back and laughed in a deliberate display of bravado. He realized that she might interpret his loud manner as callous or indifferent to her obvious trepidation, but he considered it worth the risk if he could accompany her. 

“Nonsense! What sort of Jedi would I be if I did not offer aid to everyone I cross paths with? A true Jedi must help every being in need, including other Jedi!” 

“I don’t mean to be a bother…”

A quiet shake of his head put the other young Jedi at ease. Lorenz stretched out his arm towards the waiting field in a deliberately theatrical manner. 

“Not whatsoever. Besides, I think your goal of seeing the brith and my goal of observing the Force through nature align perfectly! If you’ll follow me, err… I’m so sorry. I did not ask your name…”

The young woman did not exactly smile, but her downcast eyes did alight again and her expression softened at Lorenz's question.

“Marianne von Edmund. And you’re...”

“Lorenz Hellman Gloucester, at your service!” 

Lorenz introduced himself to her as if every being in the galaxy observed him. He knew he risked judgement from this near-stranger, but something about Marianne drove Lorenz into a frenzy of emotions. He tried releasing them all in his self-introduction, but as they walked silently together towards the hill Lorenz mentioned earlier, he found himself still overcome by her beauty and loveliness. As they crested the knoll and watched the massive brith glide through the air overhead, Lorenz knew that he would seek out Marianne's companionship again, Jedi Code or no Jedi Code.

He considered her worth the risk.


	2. Instability

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Marianne and Lorenz have a discussion in the stables about the obligation of the Jedi and Marianne's bloodline briefly asserts itself on her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For Loremari Week 2020 Day 2: Animals

Marianne thought that the stables attached to the Jedi Enclave seemed far quieter than usual. Whenever she entered, the braying of the penned nerfs usually rang out all around and made her feel more at ease. But the nerfs seemed quieter today, as if something startled them just before Marianne entered. 

She took a few steps toward her favorite of the nerfs, a large brown pack-hauler named Dorte. He huffed a greeting towards her as she placed her hand on his head and gently stroked his fur. Though incapable of speech as most in the galaxy would understand it, Dorte’s thoughts and feelings could sometimes appear in Marianne’s mind like speech when she invited it. As she relaxed and extended her senses through the Force, she felt the familiar presence of her four-legged friend in her mind.

“Hello Dorte! How are you today? I hope you’ve been keeping well and the younglings haven’t been too rough with you.”

The response came in its usual fashion. A burst of images and animalistic emotions that only made any kind of sense to Marianne because of her deep familiarity with Dorte.

_Sleep. Noise. Awake. Stranger. Fear!_

Marianne’s eyes jolted open and she looked around the stable. At first, nothing seemed amiss. But then Marianne saw it. The gates to one of the pens stood slightly ajar and swayed slowly in the light breeze that flowed through the space. Marianne withdrew her hand from Dorte and brought it closer towards the lightsaber clipped to her belt. As she approached the opened pen, she began speaking. 

“Is someone there? You… You need to show yourself.”

No response came. Because of her position, Marianne could not see into the opened pen. Suddenly the light of the midmorning sun offered her no comfort and Marianne fully removed the lightsaber from her belt, her thumb pressed to the ignition switch. As she edged ever closer, she could feel her hands running cold and a knot of fear twisting itself in her stomach. 

“Last… Last warning! Show yourself!”

Again, no answer emerged. Marianne put her free hand on the gate to the pen and took one last steadying breath. Then in a single motion, she threw open the gate, dashed inside the space, and ignited her lightsaber. Azure light illuminated the entire stable and made Marianne’s pale skin appear as blue as water. She could feel her face contorting into a scowl. The violation of her favorite part of the enclave disturbed her greatly and only the lightsaber in her hand made her feel as if she still held any control. 

But her fears immediately subsided upon seeing Lorenz seated on the floor of the pen. Hay stuck out from his robes and hair at funny angles and he wore an expression of utter despair. Surprise played across Marianne’s face and she brought her lightsaber back down to her side. Worryingly, she never remembered raising it for a strike.

“Lorenz? What are you doing here?”

The young man’s skin turned a bright shade of red as he stood up and brushed the hay from his robes. 

“I-- I came to check on the nerfs! You know, just like my master told me to... Haha!”

Marianne turned off her saber and clipped it back to her belt. In this light, Lorenz looked even more handsome than when she saw him in the field. The bit of dirt on him from the stables somehow made him seem more… ordinary. Fallible. Human.

“I assure you, I had no intention of encountering you here! This is just a happy coincidence! The Force certainly does work in mysterious ways!”

Lorenz’s demeanor seemed forced to Marianne, but she decided that she would not press Lorenz on the matter. After all, Marianne could sense embarrassment coming off him in waves. To Marianne’s surprise, Lorenz suddenly spoke again and without the bluster of his earlier excuses.

“I thought I might find you here and talk with you more. But then you entered and seemed so happy… I was embarrassed that I would impose myself on that happiness. So I tried hiding down here so as not to disturb you. Not very Jedi-like, is it?”

Once again Lorenz’s obsession with maintaining the nobility of the Jedi cropped up again. 

“Why are you so concerned with the way you present yourself to others?”

Lorenz looked taken aback. Perhaps she asked too much of the young man too soon. But her attraction to him made her interested in understanding him better, even his strange complex around the duties and obligations of a Jedi.

“Well, I-- I suppose I just don’t want to disappoint all the other Jedi here and throughout the galaxy. If ordinary beings see Jedi as anything less than the noble guardians we are, how will we command respect and maintain order?”

Marianne felt emboldened by Lorenz’s sudden honesty and pressed him for more.

“So it’s about exerting control?”

The young man’s face twisted into a grimace. He seemed distraught at Marianne’s interpretation of his words, rather than any fault of hers. 

“No, forgive me. My words seem… Scrambled when I speak with you.”

“I’m sorry.”

A bit of joviality returned to Lorenz and he picked a piece of straw out of his hair. 

“Don’t be! I didn’t mean it as anything less than a compliment. You are… unique among the students here. Hence why I sought you out!” 

Lorenz took a deep breath before speaking again.

“Suffice to say that I believe a large separation exists between the common beings of the galaxy and the Jedi. If we do not maintain this distinction in all things, including appearance, then nothing would make the Jedi Order special. And then how could we keep the peace?”

“I’m sorry you feel that way.”

Shock played across Lorenz’s face at Marianne’s sudden and harsh response.

“What?”

“To me, the Jedi Order isn’t something so special. It’s something we were forced into as children, without choice. The Jedi make mistakes all the time. And we’ve inherited all the mistakes of those Jedi who came before without ever asking for it or deserving it.”

Marianne saw a hurt expression on Lorenz’s face. It almost seemed as if Marianne had struck him across the chin with her words alone. He sucked in air for one second before composing himself again and moving towards the gate of the pen.

“I-- I can see we do not agree on this issue. I will take my leave and think about what you have said.”

With that, the young Jedi left the stables as quickly as propriety allowed. Marianne shook her head at his stiffness and glanced down at her own hands. Lorenz did not bear the burden she did. He could never understand. She felt stupid for even trying. For a moment, her anger and shame welled within her and she saw dark auras of energy swim around her forearms. 

In a moment, she reasserted her will over the darkness lingering inside her. Though she could not see it, Marianne’s own eyes glowed with the yellow of the Sith before they returned to her ordinary brown.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maybe a little heavy-handed here? Wrote this chapter at the end of a long day and after giving a pint of blood. But I know it builds to what I want from the rest of the week so I'll publish it and run with it. Here's hoping I don't hate it in the morning!


	3. A Night's Advice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lorenz goes to the famed smuggler Manuela for advice. He gets more than he bargained for. 
> 
> For LoreMari Week 2020. Third prompt, May 12: Ball/Dance/Fairytales/Folktales

The night air of the enclave’s docking bay pulsated with heat from the engines of the ships there. Lorenz found it discomforting and wondered to himself if this raw warmth would affect the condition of his luscious hair. Still, his objective lay further inside and he proceeded at the fastest walking pace he could muster. 

Lorenz rarely came to this section of the Jedi Enclave. The docking bay adjoined the few quarters allocated to ordinary civilians who had long-term business with the Jedi. Lorenz had nothing against those without the blessing of the Force in their bloodline, but he also did not often seek their company. After all, what could an ordinary being offer a young Jedi-in-training like Lorenz? 

Still, Lorenz did enjoy the perspective of at least one outsider. Manuela, she called herself. He heard rumors that she rotated aliases as she smuggled goods across the galaxy. Some claimed that she once starred in operas broadcast in the heart of the Republic, Coruscant. Though Lorenz did possess a degree of curiosity about her background, he found her present far more intriguing.

He could see her sitting at one of the open-air cantinas near the docked vessels. Lorenz knew that Manuela loved nothing more than holding court in such places and dazzling every being within listening range with her incredible stories of narrow escapes, thrilling heists, and fortunes won and lost at the pazaak tables of exotic worlds. Lorenz doubted that any of the stories held even a grain of truth… Yet when he did listen in, he always found himself more than a little impressed with Manuela’s outlandish folktales. 

As Lorenz entered the cantina and strode confidently towards where Manuela stood with a nearly-empty glass in her hand, the motley assortment of aliens and droids moved away from her. She turned slowly towards Lorenz and cocked an eyebrow.

“Now Lorenz, surely a young Jedi like yourself possesses better manners than that. You’ve spoiled my fun!”

Manuela’s honeyed voice spilled out of her with an ease that could only come from consumption of strong drinks. Lorenz possessed little experience with alcohol, but he judged that Maunela still possessed enough sense to speak with him. With a single wave of his hand, he summoned a nearby chair with the Force and Manuela stumbled backwards into a seated position on it. Lorenz grabbed a chair for himself and the two of them stared at each other from across one of the cantina’s greasy tables. 

“You seem oddly troubled, Lorenz. Why don’t you tell this friendly smuggler all your woes?”

“How can you tell my mood, Miss Manuela?” 

Manuela smiled as soon as the word “miss” left Lorenz’s mouth. 

“Because you entered the cantina without a word. Usually you announce yourself with such… authority.” 

A serpentine smile worked its way across Manuela’s face and Lorenz fought back an argument gathering in his throat. 

“Very well, I shall get right to it. You once said that I should come to you if I had any… questions. Concerning women.”

At this, Manuela’s eyes shot open from the sleepy haze that her buzz granted her and set aside the remainder of her drink.

“That I did, though I honestly never expected that you would take me up on it!”

“There is a young woman in the academy. She is remarkable in many ways, yet… She does not view her membership in the Jedi Order as a privilege. She thinks of it as a curse, passed down through the generations. She clearly resents that she did not have a choice in joining the Order.”

Manuela cocked her head at Lorenz’s words. A few moments passed before she answered and when she did, she initially did not look Lorenz directly in the eye. 

“I can’t say I blame her. Lorenz, I respect the Jedi. Your order of knights saved my life back when I ran afoul of the Hutts. Hell, I’ve been running supplies out to this little enclave for years now. But I don’t envy you. Or any Jedi, for that matter. They take you from your families, dictate what you can do, and teach you absolute devotion to their Jedi Code.” 

The smuggler's words felt like cold water to Lorenz. How could someone not desire a life as a Jedi? Especially an ordinary individual, without any connection to the Force. It seemed impossible to the young man. But before he could get another word out, Manuela held up a finger that demanded his continued silence. When she spoke again, her eyes now stared directly back into his. 

“You Jedi kids never got the opportunity to choose what you wanted to do for yourselves! You never even got to discover who you really are! Lorenz, I’ve always liked you, but make no mistake: you’re a young man who still acts like a child. You separate everything into two piles: Jedi or not Jedi. Anything that isn’t befitting or proper for a Jedi you pay no mind to.”

Lorenz felt a deep shame welling within him. It seemed as though Manuela could see directly into his heart. More likely though, she simply paid attention to him whenever he spoke about himself and the noble role of the Jedi in the galaxy. So many others simply tuned him out of their awareness when he would speak on such things. 

“But that thinking only carries you so far, Lorenz. This young woman of yours, she doesn’t fit into your easy categories. She’s a fellow Jedi, which you like! But she doesn’t appreciate the Jedi, which you don’t like. And it’s plainly obvious you’re attracted to her, which isn’t very Jedi-like at all, now is it?”

After another moment of silence between the two of them, Lorenz gave a slow nod. The Jedi Code forbade love and attachment, making his feelings towards Marianne a failing in the eyes of his masters. 

“I’ll confess something to you, Lorenz: I’ve always respected the Jedi, but I don’t like most of them. You’re an exception because you’re so wonderfully naive. But I’d rather have you grow up into a man who can think for himself than an ignorant boy who just blindly follows the Jedi Code forever. Even if it means losing that naiveté I like so much.”

For a long while, the two of them sat there saying nothing. Lorenz felt as if the ground beneath his feet might swallow him. His head slumped and he suddenly felt extremely conscious of the stillness of his hands on the table between them. Then he finally looked back at Manuela. 

“Thank you, Miss Manuela. I did not know what I sought from you when I entered, but you have given me a great deal to think about.” 

Manuela finally smiled again. She stood up and picked up her drink from the table. Before walking away, she placed a hand on the young man’s shoulder and looked down at where he still sat.

“The night is still young Lorenz. Plenty of time for you to find this girl of yours and form… attachments.”

The older woman walked off back to where her listeners from before remained gathered and greeted them with a loud expletive that made Lorenz laugh despite himself. He stood up quietly from the table, leaving a few credits for the cantina’s staff, and made his way back towards the Jedi Enclave.


	4. Steady

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lorenz and Marianne make a decision about their future together. 
> 
> For LoreMari Week 2020. Fourth prompt, May 13: Confession/Quiet Tranquility

Marianne could feel herself floating a few centimeters off the ground with the aid of the Force. Submerged in her meditation ritual, her senses extended far beyond herself, yet she felt almost nothing. In her mind, she likened it to submerging herself in water, yet still hearing every echo in the sea. She meditated so that she once again might ask the Force for forgiveness. The Force did not speak to her in any conscious way, but hoped that she might someday interpret its will the same way she did with animals. 

A knock at her door shook her out of her reverie and she returned to the floor of her quarters with a thump. Upset at the disruption of her daily ritual, she briefly felt a swell of anger rise and fill her mind. But years of training fought it down and she calmly strode up to the door. 

She could sense Lorenz beyond the threshold without looking. He radiated nervousness. Marianne found this odd, as Lorenz usually projected strength and confidence. One reason she enjoyed her time with him stemmed from this fact. His strong emotions and confidence shone out through the Force. Despite his boisterousness, being around Lorenz made Marianne feel calm. 

But now he arrived like a wave crashing against her shore and she did not know why. She opened the door a crack and saw a serious expression on the young man’s face.

“Hello Lorenz.”

Lorenz jolted as if he did not expect her to actually greet her. 

“Oh! Marianne! I-- I hope I have not interrupted anything!”

“I was only meditating. Why are you here? Have I done something wrong?”

“Not at all. I simply wanted to speak with you. Provided you have time, of course!”

Marianne opened the door wider and stepped back inside her inside her quarters. Lorenz followed her inside and gently shut the door behind himself. For a moment, they merely stared into one another’s eyes. Then Marianne looked away. 

“What was it you wanted to say?”

Lorenz’s composure broke for a moment and he stammered the next few words.

“I-- I wanted to speak with you about our time together so far!” 

A puzzled expression struck Marianne’s face. Lorenz and Marianne had shared meals together for a while and gone on a few walks since that day she discovered him in the stables, but nothing that occurred during those meetings struck her as particularly significant. Except for the fact that such meetings happened at all. Most other Jedi kept their distance from Marianne and she from them. But Lorenz sought her out and she always welcomed his presence, though rarely with open conversation. 

“I wanted to say that, although we have only just started to learn about one another, I find you-- I mean to say that, although we are both Jedi, perhaps we could…”

The words trailed off and Lorenz took a step closer towards Marianne. This made her look up and she suddenly found herself bound by his gaze. His normally proud features resolved into something softer and his expression, while not downcast, no longer held its usual smile. 

“I know we have both made oaths to the Jedi Order. Mine comes willingly. Yours does not. But I want to spend more time with you, regardless of any rules or structures that stand between us. If you would have me.”

Understanding dawned in Marianne and she could not help but widen her eyes in shock. 

“Lorenz… Are you asking if I will be your… Companion? Romantically?”

“Romantically. Yes.”

Red filled Marianne’s cheeks but still she did not look away. This seriousness that possessed Lorenz made him seem even more attractive. Knowing that he held such depths beneath his blustering surface impression intrigued her. And his lowered voice and nearness made her heart skip with a feeling she could not name. 

“I… I think I would like that, Lorenz.”

She expected that Lorenz would shout his excitement and break the spell, but no such outburst came. Lorenz simply took her in his arms and pressed her to his chest. Marianne never realized that his lean form still possessed such firm strength. She felt safe in his arms and exhaled a breath she did not know she was holding. Lorenz spoke softly in her ear, never releasing his arms from her.

“I don’t know what happens next, Marianne. Perhaps they will expel us from the Jedi Order.”

“Only if they discover us. And I wouldn’t mind anyway.”

Marianne reached up with her right hand and ran her fingers through Lorenz’s purple hair. The young man shivered with something other than fear and she could feel his pulse quicken at her touch. She pressed his head towards her own and their lips met in a kiss. 

Marianne never kissed anyone before, so she had no context for the sensation she now felt. Lorenz’s lips felt warm and the breath coming from him sent electricity though her skin. He kissed her gently, as if he feared he might break the spell between them. That suited Marianne just fine. She liked this new side of Lorenz. Not the Jedi with dreams of adventure, but a young man with dreams of her. 

When they finally broke apart, Lorenz spoke first.

"I-- Thank you, Marianne. For everything."

"You should go before someone discovers you here."

Lorenz nodded and quickly made his way to the door to her room. He turned back towards Marianne. 

"I will see you soon. I promise."

In response to his words, Marianne smiled at him for the first time. 

"I'm looking forward to it."

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I sincerely hope you enjoyed this first installment of this fic. I tried linking Lorenz's feelings about the nobility with how he views being a Jedi in this AU, but I worry it comes across as overbearing and stiff. Let me know what you think!
> 
> You hopefully noticed I never named Lorenz's master. That was deliberate. She's an established character from Legends and probably the last person in the galaxy who you would expect to teach Lorenz...


End file.
